Friday, August 6, 2010

Restful Sleep



Pregnancy is really getting to your mom. She's uncomfortable, she can't relax, and she can't sleep... Unless of course she is in my hammock she bought me for Father's Day. I now understand the reason she didn't think that the IPod Stereo I bought her for her birthday was so genuine.

It has effected her sleeping though. Your feet digging into her ribs and constant moving around has changed her from a coma sleep to a light one. Therefore my nights of easy slumber have been FUBAR'd as well. The beautiful woman who slept through house fires is now a beautiful woman who kicks me when I snore and says "ROLL OVER! YOU'RE SNORING!" a few times a night. The whole house fire thing, true story.

One night after we had been out with some friends Mom went to bed and I stayed up. Through the office window, which is now your window, I saw flashing lights. I went out and saw firetrucks and Firemen. I went over to see if they needed my help.* They didn't so I went in to wake up your mom, I mean hell, our neighbor's house was on fire. She needed to know. So I went into our bedroom and shook her foot. "Ash, our neighbor's house is on fire." She said, "OK".

"Ashley, our nieghbor's house is on fire."

"Fine." She said. At this point I am laughing and shaking her. "Ash! Our neighbor's house is ON FIRE!"

"Fine Beau," and she rolled over. She didn't care, she was sleeping and I was not going to wake her. I ended up going to our other neighbor's, Samir, and after trying to help the other neighbor get a claim filed, and a few "Bosnian sips of Vodka" went home. By the way, they don't sip. They are great hosts though. I went home and slept on the couch because I smelled like house fire.

The next morning your mom came downstairs and said, "BEAU! Our neighbor's house burnt down last night!"

You did this. Your awoken the sleeping pregnant lady. I used to sleep next to a beautiful coma woman. Now I get elbowed for snoring. And to think... some day I will look back upon this time as when I got a good nights rest.


*Firemen do not need your help. You are in the way.*

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