Life Insurance Family

Parents bring work home with them, and it effects the conversation around the house. That is why Rex and Rob Ryan are coaches like their dad Buddy Ryan who was the defensive coordinator with the Chicago Bears. Bill Belicheck and the brothers Harbaugh are coaches kids too. I can't say that these dads meant for their kids to follow in the family trade of coaching, but they did. I don't know that these dads taught their kids on purpose, but kids learn things. They learn defensive schemes because dad thinks they are important and because osmosis is a bitch sometimes.

On a way less awesome level that is why I am from a life insurance family. My Grandpa Don brought it home and exposed my dad just like my dad in turn exposed your uncle Gabe and I. I don't think my dad ever intended for us to be in the business, and I know mom wasn't super excited about it, but yet here we are. You will not have the benefit of learning why Buddy Ryan dropped the strong safety into the box thereby creating the 4-6 defense that catapulted the '85 Bears into football immortality, or the intricacies of football wizardry that make Jim and John Harbaugh elite NFL head coaches.

So this is what you will get. People die. People that die after thinking about their family's well being without them die with a greater sense of peace, and you should be able to openly discuss life without a parent or spouse. What a bummer for you, huh? I knew what my parents wanted for me if they were gone before I knew what a free safety's responsibility on trips left ace formation was. The fact is I talk to people for a living now about what they want for there kids if they are gone, and I still don't know what the free safety should key on (although the rule of thumb would be that no one gets deeper than him.) I make a living talking to people about when they die (life insurance), when they wreck their car or their house burns down (auto and home insurance), or when they get cancer or break bones (health insurance). Wow my job felt more fun until I typed that out.

My Grandma J, who was one of the most important people in my life, passed away a few weeks ago. I was of course really shook up and shed my share of tears, but because we were a life insurance family I was never that sad. I was in the room when Grandma J took her final breaths. I was watching her in fact. I always knew I would be there when she passed. We were close like that. When I realized she was gone I was instantly ready for the next steps of moving on like getting her funeral plans from her nursing home room, and calling my brother. I instantly had a a flash back to Grandma J telling a very young little Beau, "Your body is just the vehicle for while you are here. When your body dies you get to go to heaven and see all the friends and family that you have been missing." So there I was just having seen Grandma J pass away in a mortal sense and within an hour feeling happy for her that she was with Grandpa Don now, and just a little sad for myself that I couldn't stop and see her next weekend.

Being from a life insurance family means you will have a little more perspective on the fragility of life, and life after you or without your mom and I. You will probably be exposed to conversations that would make most kids really weirded out and they might weird you out as well. Just know that at some moment they might bring you peace. They will not however make you feel any better when you see the strong safety bite on play action as the slot receiver runs a post pattern right behind him to cost the Bears the game.

*I am posting this a few months after it was originally posted.  At the time I wrote it I was trying to convey a sense of strength in dealing with the death of Gramma J, who is one of my heroes.  The life insurance family part is true.  The unique perspective of a family who talks about death is true, but there is one thing I missed. I think it is because I wasn't ready to admit it yet.  Death sucks.  I miss Gramma J every damn day.  I often think back to her holding you, Cruz, and the way she wouldn't say anything.  I think she was so overwhelmed with the happiness, pride, and joy that you brought that she didn't have the words.  Life is fragile and things mean more as you get older.  I thank God every day that she got meet you, and that I got to be a part of it.  I was lucky enough to see that.  I hope I live every day looking at you and your mom that way.  Overwhelmed with the joy of family.  Don't fear death.  Don't let the end cloud the moment, but always appreciate the moment at hand.  I miss that woman.  I miss my Gramma.  I want to call her at least once a week, but I never live in regret.  She knew how much I loved her, and I her as well.  Live that way.  It's worth it.