The Four Head

So what, I am not even doing my own pics. I know that says stock photo. So what. Quit judging me.

When I was growing up my dad was bald. Actually, since I was born my dad has been bald. It wasn't just while I was growing up. He didn't go from Hulk Hogan to Fabio just because I hit my twenties. So anyways, dad is bald. He would always make a joke about how his 4head had become a 12 head (4 fingers between your hairline and eyebrows is normal, for a bald man it's 12 fingers. You are trying it right now aren't you? It works huh?)

I am still holding steady at a 4head. How have I managed this despite my balding genes? Well son, here is the secret. I keep getting fatter. The fatter I am the fatter my fingers are which when held against my forehead makes me feel like I am not losing my hair. So if I ever end up being fat as hell holding my fat paws against my forehead yelling that I am not going bald you will know why. It won't be pretty. Denial never is.